D20 Table: Pick a Goblin's Pocket
The goblins stand in a tight huddle, fiercely arguing over something. Meat? Trinkets? It’s impossible to tell—you don’t speak goblin. But theft? Theft is a language in which you’re fluent. They may not be the juiciest of marks, but who are you to refuse such an invitation? You slink closer, hand outstretched, hoping their pockets hold more treasures than teeth.
Roll a d20 to find out what our hero pilfers from these dubious marks...
1. An elaborate finger trap made from coiled rat sinew and splintered reeds. The moment you tug it, it snaps tight around your finger with a thwack. The goblin turns slowly toward you, grinning.
2. Two recently decapitated fish heads wrapped in a greasy scrap of cloth. They blink. You swear they blinked.
3. A small black beetle with long, twitching antennae. He gives you a look as if to say, “Who are you?”
4. A small collection of unblown dandelions wrapped in parchment paper.
5. A pouch of pebble-hard crickets. You worry that these are for eating.
6. One enormous toenail, clearly a trophy, sanded smooth along the edges and polished to a mirror shine.
7. A mummified frog wearing a tiny vest sewn from furry rat leather.
8. A 16-inch string of delicate snail shells. A gift for a lady goblin?
9. A cracked monocle with a spiderweb pattern of fractures.
10. One dozen glass marbles in assorted colors. Who would steal a child’s marbles?
11. A shiny brass button torn from a constable’s jerkin. It bears the emblem of the municipality you are currently in.
12. An artisan-quality hand drum assembled from stretched possum skin, accompanied by a small bone mallet.
13. A fist-sized clump of tangled hair (multiple species), held together with an elegant lady’s brooch.
14. A small brass key labeled “DO NOT LOSE.” Whatever it belongs to, the goblin just lost it.
15. A shank-style knife made from a shard of deep blue glass and wrapped in dirty twine. Whatever the goblin smashed to make it must have been downright elegant.
16. A still-warm pastry wrapped in wax paper. Recently boosted. Is it still safe to eat despite where it’s been?
17. A small wooden whistle that produces the sound of a human’s wheezing cough when blown.
18. A lantern constructed from wire and a stoppered bottle of thick green glass. Inside, a captured glow-worm pulses steadily, casting a soft emerald light. Grass clippings, a well-chosen twig perch, and a few measured drops of moisture suggest this is a well-loved pet rather than a prisoner.
19. An elegant silver table setting for one, composed of a salad fork, a dinner fork, a dainty teaspoon, and a butter knife. Each piece is engraved with the initials E.M.
20. A tattered map of the town and the outlying farms. On the northern outskirts, a crude circle marks an area labeled, “Goblin Hoarde.”
Created by Alternate Win — your daily spark for tabletop creativity.